Thursday, July 5, 2012

Thursday Funnies

Joe wanted to buy a motorbike. He doesn't have much luck until one day he comes across a Harley with a For Sale sign on it. The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old. It is shiny and in absolute mint condition. He immediately buys it, and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years." Well, its quite simple, really," says the seller, "whenever the bike is outside and its going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It protects it from the rain." And he hands Joe a jar of Vaseline.

That night, his girlfriend, Sandra, invites him over to meet her parents. Naturally, they take the bike there. But just before they enter the house, Sandra stops him and says, "I have to tell you something about my family before we go in." "When we eat dinner, we don't talk. In fact, the first person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes." "No problem," he says. And in they go.

Joe is shocked. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes.
In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes. Piled up on the stairs, in the corridor, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes. They sit down to dinner and, sure enough, no says a word. As dinner progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the situation. So he leans over and kisses Sandra. No one says a word. So he reaches over and fondles her breasts. Still, nobody says a word. So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the table, and has sex with her, in front of her parents. His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word. He looks at her mom. "She's got a great body," he thinks. So he grabs the mom, bends her over the dinner table, and has his way with her every which way right there on the dinner table. Now his girlfriend is furious and her dad is boiling, but still, total silence.

All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain. Joe remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket. Suddenly the father backs away from the table and shouts, "All right, that's enough, I'll do the damn dishes!"


Schteveo said...

That's great!!!

pootz said...

look, for the last time THERE IS NOTHING FUNNY ABOUT THURSDAY. unless the foisht coon gets sick-elle cell ona thursday.

Kids shelves are turning into a nitemare. more later along with the story of a friend of mine who was putting up drywall and screwed his hand to the wall.



LOOK, The guy was NOT fukking his girfrien and her mother. He owns a HARLY and everybody knows Harley owners ------R GAY-----.

The vaseline and looking at her father is probably spot on.

There isn't a Harley rider in the world with the Seminal Vesiculature
to get on a real bike like a ZX14R or Panigali or even an R6 (which is a girls bike)..

O and by the way EAT ME!

Spider said...

Now here's a great idea from a blogger at Moonbattery. Of course, it would require Republicans to grow some balls, and we all know the chances of that happening.

"What if the other side (Republicans) were to take advantage of the gaping hole CJ Roberts blew through the Constitution he swore to uphold? Given the powerful correlation between firearm ownership and crime reduction, Republicans might decree that all Americans, and also liberals, who happen to live in America "must" buy a gun..."


I like BOW said...


Juicin Atcha said...

Yo BOW ya wanna xprain tew dez Yay Whoz jes wut Seminal Vesiculature hoppen 2 B?