"President Obama has eclipsed P. T. Barnum's wildest dreams by pitching the biggest economic and social hoax in the history of this great nation. All that is left for this audacious ringmaster-in-chief to do is sell the hoax and implement his radical socialist plan for America." – Neil Braithwaite
I think the remake should be done with the entire cast made up of gay black midgets, with one of them having hidden cannibalistic tendencies. Each week the audience can vote on who they think it is.
There will be prizes awarded to the audience member who guesses right. Obviously, you would have to submit your guess before the end of the season, because waiting for the last show when there's only one person left would be cheating.
Here's a pre-show clue; We will be hearing the words, "yum, yum, eat 'em up" eerily and mysteriously wispered in the background of every episode, without letting us know who said it. Personally, i'm getting my DVR ready.
CIA - Job Opening: The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists: two men and one woman. For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
“We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. You have to kill her.”
The first man said, “You can’t be serious. I could never shoot my wife.”
The agent replies, “Then you’re not the right man for this job.”
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the agent came out with tears in his eyes. “I tried, but I can’t kill my wife.”
The agent replies, “You don’t have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.”
Finally, it was the woman’s turn. Only she was told to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, “You guys didn’t tell me the gun was loaded with blanks. I had to beat him to death with the chair.
11 comments:
Two things, first, "Why?", second, "...how can thy re-cast those classic characters?" It never works, John Goodman is NOT Fred Flintstone.
What next, the Aflac Duck and the Energizer Bunny, in a big screen, live-action version of "Rabbit Fire"?
The whole idea is dethpicable!!
ugh...no really...ugh
How bout Krersty Ally as the Island?
Sorry, can't spell fat asses names
LMAO!!
QUOTABLE QUOTES
"President Obama has eclipsed P. T. Barnum's wildest dreams by pitching the biggest economic and social hoax in the history of this great nation. All that is left for this audacious ringmaster-in-chief to do is sell the hoax and implement his radical socialist plan for America."
– Neil Braithwaite
Dawn Wells thinks "Giligan" needs to be [here it comes]
DIVERSE!!!
She's been in Hollywood too long.
I think the remake should be done with the entire cast made up of gay black midgets, with one of them having hidden cannibalistic tendencies. Each week the audience can vote on who they think it is.
There will be prizes awarded to the audience member who guesses right. Obviously, you would have to submit your guess before the end of the season, because waiting for the last show when there's only one person left would be cheating.
Here's a pre-show clue; We will be hearing the words, "yum, yum, eat 'em up" eerily and mysteriously wispered in the background of every episode, without letting us know who said it. Personally, i'm getting my DVR ready.
With Gary Coleman as "Skipper" and Webster as Gilligan?
Send them in for a little audition.
CIA - Job Opening:
The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists: two men and one woman. For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
“We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. You have to kill her.”
The first man said, “You can’t be serious. I could never shoot my wife.”
The agent replies, “Then you’re not the right man for this job.”
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the agent came out with tears in his eyes. “I tried, but I can’t kill my wife.”
The agent replies, “You don’t have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.”
Finally, it was the woman’s turn. Only she was told to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, “You guys didn’t tell me the gun was loaded with blanks. I had to beat him to death with the chair.
Will they vote each other off the island?
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