Tuesday, October 6, 2009

QUICK!! Somebody out West, send me some Roadrunners!!

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SERIOUSLY, I NEED ROADRUNNERS!!! I posted this hours ago and no one has offered the first roadrunner!!
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This is the UN-story of the day.
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Why is that Schteveo, you might ask. Because it was THE story of the day, this time last year, when some elementary school kids reported a coyote had taken their LUNCH BAGS while the kids horsed around at the bus stop.
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Coyote population steadily rising in N.C.
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If you think it's not a true UN-story, look at the date on the picture.
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Schteve says "BEEP BEEP!!"
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6 comments:

Jimbo said...

I'd send you a roadrunner, but I can't catch one.

Actually, I'm not certain what good it would do you, anyhow. Distract the coyote? The best thing I've found for coyotes is a 30.06. Or greyhounds. Greyhounds consider chasing down coyotes (and killing them) great sport.

Now, if you had a rattlesnake problem...

Schteveo said...

I have it o good authority that roadrunners will wear out a coyote. They cause them to drop rocks on themselves, fall off cliffs, ride rocket skates into train tunnels, slam into rock walls flying on Acme Bat Wings...

If I can get three or four roadrunners, I'll rent them out to coyote haters and GET RICH!!

Bwahahahaha....

Anonymous said...

Beep, Beep!

Anonymous said...

The Truth:

If a conservative doesn’t like guns, he doesn`t buy one.
If a liberal doesn’t like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.

If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn`t eat meat.
If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.

If a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy.
A liberal wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.

If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.

If a black man or Hispanic are conservative, they see themselves as independently successful.
Their liberal counterparts see themselves as victims in need of government protection.

If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.

If a conservative doesn’t like a talk show host, he switches channels.
Liberals demand that those they don’t like be shut down.

If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn’t go to church.
A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced. (Unless it’s a foreign religion, of course!)

If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it.
A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.

If a conservative slips and falls in a store, he gets up, laughs and is embarrassed.
If a liberal slips and falls, he grabs his neck, moans like he’s in labor and then sues.

Conservatives believe in freedom, responsibility, tradition, and self-reliance.
Liberals believe in license, government restrictions, upending tradition, and collectives.

Conservatives feel there is a right and wrong.
Liberals feel that nothing is really wrong… unless it is believed by a conservative.

Schteveo said...

But is that the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you...uh...ummm...oy, yeah, uhhhh...next caller please.




(12 hours and not one friggin' roadrunner yet, I thought you people were my friends)

Spider said...

My friend has a fully restored '70 (?) Roadrunner. Interested? (think mid 6 figures)