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You know the "The Onion" right, the mock news paper with the crazy stories?
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Well here is a story that sounds "Onionish" to me. Marlon Jackson, Michael's brother and a member of the Jackson 5, is going to open a resort / theme park in Nigeria. What's the theme?
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Slavery.
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Pardon my french, but, I SHIT you not, this is for real. A slavery history theme park and resort. From the article,
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The development will cater to the country's growing tourism industry, particularly African-American tourists who wish to trace their Nigerian roots. Visitors will be able to explore the site of the former transatlantic slave trade, honour the hundreds of thousands who died in what were horrific human rights abuses, and then head off for a round of golf or a massage, before gawping at animatronic versions of the siblings who sang ABC and I Want You Back.
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Honor the dead slaves and then play GOLF!? Maybe I don't get it because I'm a white coward, but how do you honor the slave trade victims with this idea? Where is the HONOR located in theme park rides, hot rock massages, clean sheets and golf? I guess to cater to the African-Americans they'll serve all the beer in "forties"? Fried chicken and watermelon on every buffet? All the bling is guaranteed to NOT contain blood diamonds? Oh man, this is just wrong!!
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I can see the brochure now...
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"Hey, African-Americans, come and see where GGG-grandpa Kunta Kinte came from, and play 18 holes on the newest, and only, Tiger Wood approved course in Africa. We've got the coolest new rides on the Dark Continent for the kiddies. Come see the Amistad Ride!! It's like one of those BIG pirate ship swings. But instead of seats, we chain you to the bottom of the boat!!"
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This is the sickest, the most ill conceived, twisted thing I've heard in a while. If a white guy had proposed this Al Sharpton would have been on CNN bitching about it. Charlie Wrangle would be screaming in Congress. But Marlon gets a pass.
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Proving once again, the Jackson's are some SICK puppies.
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Schteveo is appalled
10 comments:
One explaination for this may be the fact that the Jackson family's financial situation is far worse than this country's is, thanks mostly to their little freakaziod brother. Why Nigeria? No creditors waiting at the gates! And since most of the Jacksons are still some shade of black, they'll probably feel safer there.
Do you think that their tour will also include an exhibit showing how most African blacks were actually sold into slavery by their own tribal leaders? No, neither do i.
Ken Venturi:
"Tiger Woods, you just won your 8th Masters Tournament, what do you do now?"
Tiger:
"Well, I'm going to Slavery Park in Nigeria, where I'll be chained to the inside of a slave-trade ship to get the feel of what it was like for my father's mother's great-great grand uncle, then I'm going to play a round of golf without the TV Cameras."
[laughs and applause]
John Madden:
"Donovan McNabb, you just won your FIRST Superboowl in 117 tries. What will you do now. BOOM!"
McNabb:
"Well, I'm going to Slavery Park in Nigeria, where I can relive my first 116 years in football as a loser simply because I'm black!"
[Madden applaudes]
Verne Lundquist:
"Jameer Nelson, you're an NBA all star. Where do you go next?"
Nelson:
"i begon t Nigeria to da teem park, ja no, to kine-a hang, n stuff, ja no? sheet - fo wha day pa me, I mi bi de stucker and poo coats wheh da linx be. ja no?"
mmmm - slavery golf - drooooool
MJ probably fell for one of those Nigerian $15 million E-Mails. This sounds like something that would come from the Jacksons.
Anon,
I missed that angle. But you forgot, at least, one.
Roger Godell: "Pacman Jones, you're suspended indefinitely. NOW, what will you do?"
Pacman: "I'm pro'ly goin go to the muver lan, to da Slavery
Park. Do dey got a scrip club?"
But humor aside, IS this a sick idea or what? Here's what I thought of as a similar project, a D-Day Water Park / Memorial, at Normandy in France. Complete with shooting gallery and hand grenade course.
"See where Uncle Dave died at 19 years old to secure your freedom. Have dinner cooked and served by authentic cheese eating, surrender monkeys. It's tres manifique!! THEN, ride Europe's tallest, heated water slide. Open 365 days per year. (prices slightly higher on June 6th yearly)"
Hmmm, just that's weird enough to work. Oh, crap! Does putting this online qualify as securing the intellectual property?
What will Jackson do with all the 2 people that show up? OK, maybe if every black NBA, NFL and rapper who can afford to fly to Nigeria. Then that's it, oh and the president (and his family) on "official business" to Nigeria. Then what?
C-Bug,
I purposely avoided the "customer's monetary outlay" aspect of this plan. All I hear is how poor, how down trodden, how under the thumb of the man, the AA community is. Well, does the AA community have the funds to golf in Africa, or is Marlon that removed from his poor Gary, IN roots? Personally, I think it's the latter. I'm sure the majority of black people Jackson comes in contact with are in the entertainment industry and make good money.
Out of the 12 to 15 million African-Americans in the country, how many, or better still what percentage, can afford to fly to Africa to a golf resort?
All of them! Just think of all the jobs this scam will create in Nigeria. I'd call that stimulus, wouldn't you? Of course, most people in Nigeria are already working. It's called the world-wide computer scam industry.
...gawping at animatronic versions of the siblings who sang ABC and I Want You Back.
Wow--so now ALL the Jacksons will be made of plastic!
Points to CT for that one.
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